Chapter 3

Theres lots of strong language and lemons in my story, please dont read if you are easily offended!

I do not own anything, all things Twilight belong to Stephenie Myers.

Chapter 3
I’m Not in Kansas anymore!

‘Beep, Beep, Beep, Beep’ What was that noise? Had my alarm got broken? Was I going to be late for work? The sensible side of my brain tried to rouse me, shouted at me.

‘Get UP!’


Nope I wasn’t listening; I sighed and snuggled back into the warmth and comfort of sleep.

‘Get the Fuck Up right now Mackenzie May Richardson’

I tried to move my arm to turn the annoying beep of my alarm off but I couldn’t move. I tried again and still no movement, shit something wasn’t right. I was trying desperately to drag my self to somewhere near consciousness. Voices, I heard voices now calm reassuring voices telling me it was all ok, telling me that I was going to be ok.

Then I remembered.

‘Pain’

It all rushed at me, the fall, and the blackness I understood. I opened my eyes, the room was so bright.

“Too bright.” I managed to mumble before the blackness came again.

‘Beep, Beep, Beep, Beep’ this time I was more aware, more awake, I knew what they were. They were the machines that meant I was still alive. I wiggled my fingers and toes proving to myself that ok it hurt like fuck but at least I could feel that it hurt. I didn’t want to contemplate the alternative.

I wasn’t sure how long after it was that I knew I was waking up properly. Again I could hear those reassuring voices.
“…..amazing that she is still alive, she didn’t break a single bone!”
Then a new voice, this one sounded like treacle. It sounded so familiar.
“She’s a very lucky young woman, I don’t know what would have happened if Edward hadn’t been there to help her.”

My eyes snapped open. My mad unfocused eyes flew around the white room, looking for the person who had spoken. They stopped to rest on the tall incredibly pale, blonde haired doctor who was holding my charts.

“Well hello there Ms Richardson, I’m Doctor Cullen, you’ve had a nasty fall but your ok, we have been taking good care of you.” He smiled a movie star smile at me and I closed my eyes again.


‘Fuck, I’m dead’

That was the only rational explanation I could come up with. Not only was I seeing the characters from my beloved book but they actually looked like the people who had portrayed them in the film.

“Ms Richardson? Are you ok? You’ve had a terrible shock I know, but you’re on the mend.”
I pulled myself up into a sitting position, which was really hard because I still had an IV cannula in my arm. I brushed the nurses away from me who offered help but I motioned for Dr Cullen to come closer.
He moved easily towards me with a grace that was inexplicable. His eyes. His eyes were golden, nope not golden, golden amber. Nope golden burnished amber. No words could describe his eyes.

‘Oh my fuck he was Hot!’

I held my hand out for my charts, still not trusting myself to speak yet. Still if I was going to have a delusion I was glad that I was having one about a Cullen, even if it wasn’t about the Cullen I really wanted.

I passed a professional eye over my obs and apart from a concussion and some cuts and bruises I would be expecting to be released soon.

I handed the charts back to Carlisle.
I giggled manically.

‘Carlisle’

I thought how fucking cool was that?
“Right well, as soon we can, we will let you go but I think I need to keep you with us for another night at least. Just to be on the safe side.” He assured me. As he turned and went to leave I couldn’t stop myself, I reached out my hand and pinched his beautiful arse as hard as I could. I needed to see if he felt real or not. His arse was a much better option than pinching my own arm!
He didn’t even flinch! It was like trying to pinch a marble ball. He hadn’t noticed but the 2 nurses in the room with us certainly had! They gasped as they saw what I did, but they didn’t say anything as Dr Cullen hadn’t seemed to notice. I raised a conspiratorial finger of quiet sisterhood to my lips
“Shh” I said as they hurried out of the room. My eyes could no longer stay open and my eyelids shut down happily over my eyes taking me away from all the madness that had stolen itself into my world.

‘Kenze, this certainly isn’t Kansas anymore!’

I woke again with an indescribably happy nurse flinging open my curtains.
“Good Morning, I’ve brought you some breakfast, I hope you like eggs?”
My stomach turned over angrily trying to eject the thought of food.
“Erm, no thanks, im not hungry, but I would love a cup of tea if there is one?”
The nurse who was called Sandra nodded and walked hurriedly out to I presumed get me my drink.
I had done a lot of thinking through the night and I was ready to accept that for the time being this, life was real; it was as real to me as my life before, so I had come to the conclusion that Dr Cullen was just one of those weird coincidences that happen from time to time. I was also pretty sure that I was actually lying in a hospital bed somewhere and my head was just fucking with me whilst I tried to heal. I wasn’t going to question any of it, I was just going to get the fuck outta here and find Ruby.

I had asked various nurses and staff if someone had been with me when I was brought in, but none of them seemed to know. I would be seeing Dr Cullen again today so I had decided to ask my questions from the big enchilada.

Sandra returned with a steaming cup of tea which I took from her gratefully. She told me that she was going to remove my IV for me, I rolled up the dressing and flipped my arm over, she flipped some gloves on and I noticed that her hands were shaking. I remembered the first time I had had to remove someone’s IV at just how shit scared I had been. As her shaking fingers removed the surgical tape I noticed that I was holding my breath….
“Its ok, your doing great “ I encouraged her.
She took a deep breath and slipped the IV out smoothly. I grabbed the dressing and applied the necessary pressure until I was able to have a small dressing. Sandra smiled her thanks and removed her work tray.
I was just finishing my cup of tea when Dr Cullen came in.
I didn’t know how long he had been standing there, but there was a slight look of surprise on his face.
“How are you feeling today Ms Richardson?”
“Mackenzie, My names Mackenzie.”
He nodded.
“I’m doing fine…”

“…But?” He asked.

Where’s my Friend? Ruby, Ruby Harris, I was with her when I fell. Was she hurt as well? Was I brought in alone?” I was starting to get a bit agitated, Ruby was worrying me, I didn’t know if she was hurt or if she was ok, I wanted to know if she was safe or not.

Dr Cullen narrowed his eyes; he seemed to be weighing some things up. Eventually he said “Look I am discharging you today, but I don’t want you to be alone so I am sending you over some company for a little while just for the first couple of hours or so.”

I nodded, as I had expected as much. He told me he had arranged a ride back to the Lodge for me. This also answered another of my questions, I knew that I was at least staying in the place I had been in.

‘Bugger, my head hurt.’

After getting all my meds and my discharge papers, I waved to Sandra and the other nurses and went to take my leave. I got to the front automatic doors, my eyes still searching for any familiar face, when I actually did that double take thing…who knew that you actually really truly did that? Charlie was walking towards me, Charlie Swan,
Charlie, Bella is the fruit of my fucking loins, Swan!

Are you Ms Richardson? He asked me as he got closer. I nodded and he explained that he was going to give me a ride to the Lodge.
I thanked him and got in his truck.
I kept looking at him from my eye corners but when he started to seem to get uneasy I forced myself to speak to him.
“Do you know what happened to me Chief Swan?” I asked him.

“Well here’s the thing.” He paused considering his answer before he gave it. “I doubt that we will ever know exactly how you fell, but we’re all mighty glad to see you walk away from it pretty much as good as new.”

Wow, he was a man of few words, but none of them were wasted.

Charlie explained to me that the reception clerk had seen me go down the cliff steps but had become alarmed when I hadn’t returned a few hours later. They sent out a couple of the hotel staff and they put a call to the hospital and lo and behold I matched the description they had given. I asked him if I was here alone or had I been travelling with a friend or friends.

Charlie answered that judging by my papers and the information he had gotten from the hotel staff, that I was alone here on a student exchange In fact the same one that his own daughter was on only in the UK, and that I was planning to be here for at least the next school year.

The part about school year freaked me out somewhat and I hadn’t paid enough attention to what he had just said. I replayed the last couple of sentences in my head
“…..on a student exchange, in fact the same one that his own daughter was on!”
His daughter, his daughter Bella!!!
‘Fuck, Fuckity Fuck.’
This was getting more screwed up by the minute. I took a deep steadying breath, ok technically I had wished that I could be Bella but this was just way too weird.
I thanked Charlie and as I walked towards my room, the exact one I had shared with Ruby, Reassuring him that I was feeling fine. He shouted that he would pick me up in the morning and take me to school if he couldn’t sort out a car for me before then.

“My numbers at the front desk if you need to get in contact.” With that he waved and drove out of the car park.
I stood looking into the room, not wanting to step inside scared of what I may or may not find there.

The room was exactly how I had left it. Exactly apart from there was nothing to show that Ruby had ever been there. Feeling relieved that she wasn’t laying hurt somewhere as well. I decided to let this delusion run its course or what ever it needed to do. It seemed like the fates had stepped in to make sure I had the experience in Forks that I had wanted all along.



I had a bath and put on my bunny pj’s and bunny slippers. And sat wrapped up in the comforter watching tele. It was probably close to 7pm and there was a knock at the door. I got up gingerly, I really did ache, A lot! And peered through the peep hole.

“Err Mackenzie, My names Jacob; Charlie sent me. I just came over to check if you were ok? Charlie gave me something for you.”
‘Click’
Another piece of a puzzle fell into place. No wonder Lucas had seemed so familiar he could be Jacobs’s twin brother almost. I smiled hugely as I opened the door to ‘Virtual’ Jacob.

“Hi!” he said looking appreciatively at my oh so unsexy bunny wear.
“So you said Chief Swan had something for me?” I asked after a moment, trying to draw Jacobs’s eyes away from my very visible nipples. I almost ran back to the sofa and comforter and covered myself over. Jacob followed me to the sofa and not waiting to be asked dropped down.
He was HUGE! Even I felt tiny compared to him.
“Yeah,” he said finally. “He asked me to give you these.” He held out his hand and dropped a set of keys into my own. Without asking I knew that these were the keys to Bella’s truck.
“Thanks, for bringing them over Jacob, I really appreciate it.” I said honestly.
“Its ok, I wanted to see who everyone was talking about anyways.” Was his candid reply.
“Well, I survived a fall that’s all I don’t got 2 heads or nothing.” I gave him a playful nudge in the ribs and was rewarded by a beautiful white gleaming smile.
“No, you don’t have 2 heads, and I understand a bit better now why you’re the hot topic!”

“How old are you Jacob?” I asked suddenly.
“17” He replied. “You?”
“Erm…. You know what? I’m not sure!”

Jacob laughed a big friendly guffaw and suggested I look in my passport.

‘Passport, of course!’

Well it looked like my delusionhead wanted to knock a couple of years off of me and had put me down as 22.Little details, places names people all seemed a bit out of whack. I was desperate to ask Jacob about the Cullen’s, but I was unsure of what I was supposed to know and what I wasn’t, so I kept that on ice for a while thinking it best to find a more reliable source of information about the Cullen’s than Jacob.

Jacob stayed with me for the rest of the evening, he was easy company and made me laugh, which hurt, and it helped having someone there rather than be left alone in this really weird set up.
When Jacob got up to leave I thanked him as I walked him to the door.
He smiled his stunning smile and waved as he jumped onto his dirt bike. He kicked the starter once, waved and hurtled out the car park and was gone.

I took the meds that the good doctor had prescribed me and wondered what I was going to do. Through some earlier investigation, I had found that every cell number I had stored on my phone was now gone, everything that I had that linked me to my real life in some way was no where to be found. The only things I had were the things that were totally mine, not shared with anyone. A thought suddenly occurred to me and I padded my way over to my bed, I opened the little bed side table drawer and looked inside. My books were gone!
OK I am definitely IN the Twilight Zone. Why would I have put myself in this sort of delusion where I didn’t even have the solace of my beloved book for company?

‘Geez I was a mean bitch to myself!’

I thought that maybe it was because I was sort of already with my book in some weird, trippy kind of way??
I was fishing I knew but it was the best I could come up with, plus the meds were really making me light headed. I thought that I would just shut my eyes for 5 minutes….

BANG, BANG, BANG!

“What? Huh?... I’m up!”
I grabbed the duvet and stumbled across the door to answer it. Chief swan was stood there with a look of horror on his face.
“Ms Richardson, you do remember you’re at school today?”

“Yes, of course, school, gimme a second I’ll be right with you.” I ran to the bathroom, dumping the comforter on the way, switched the shower on and turned to squat and have a pee. Enjoying the beautiful view out of the front picture window as I had before.
I could see Charlie pacing and I could tell that he was not best pleased on having to wait on me.

‘Shit! I could see Charlie pacing!’

I leapt off the loo and managed to slam the door shut with my outstretched left leg just before Charlie got more of an eyeful of me than he would definitely have wanted.
I was ready in record time, and I was pleased with myself that I wasn’t going to be late. I was excited to see what the school looked like, though I was betting that it would be EXACTLY as I had imagined it!

“Did Jacob drop off the keys to Bella’s van for you last night?” The chief asked.
“Yep, he did Thank you, there really wasn’t any need for you to come with me this morning, you’ve been more than kind.”
And he had, yes he was a bit surly and definitely taciturn but you could tell that he was a good man trying to do his best for his town.

The Chief told me to follow him to the school, so I grabbed my bag and went out into the wet May morning. As I thought, there was Bella’s van, all beat up and ancient. Charlie looked at me oddly as a smile crossed my lips and I caressed the worn paintwork bonnet like it was an old friend.
“I hope your daughter won’t mind me using her car?” I asked.
“She said it was fine, and told me to let you know that it sticks in second.”
I nodded absorbing the information.
“Sticks in second, ok thanks.”

‘MACKENZIE!’
I shouted at myself.

“Did you say she told you to let me know?” I asked with a slight quiver in my voice. “Did she know I would need it before she left then?”
The chief looked a little confused and when he answered he talked really really slowly like he was talking to someone with limited mental ability or a young child.
“No, she told me when I spoke to her last night.”
I had grabbed both of the Chiefs arms in my hands and pulled him to face me.
“You spoke to her last night?” I screeched, trying to sound as casual as I possible could.
“Yes, that’s what I just said…..maybe you should have another day of rest Ms Richardson before you go to school?”
I could see the Chief was wincing slightly so I released my Kung foo grip off of his arms and replied. “No, that’s fine; I’m fine, let’s go then shall we? I don’t want to be late for my first day!”
I made a mental note to try to be around when Bella spoke to Charlie next and with mixed feelings of trepidation and excitement I followed Charlie’s Police car to school.
He stopped away from the school gates and waved me past so that it didn’t look like I was being escorted by the long arm of the law to lessons! I waved to him, but my eyes were fixed on the car park, The Car Park!!

I ran a quick eye over the cars in the parking lot, searching for a silver Volvo, there wasn’t a car of that make or colour in the lot at all. I couldn’t help but feel desperately disappointed.

‘Mackenzie May, your delusional, what did you expect? That you could orchestrate this shit?’

I felt a bit stupid hoping that I could direct my delusion.

With my head on all sorts of naughty possibilities if I had been able, I hopped out of the van and walked to the main entrance. It was weird not feeling scared or worried about walking into this alien environment. I wasn’t sure if it was because I was much older or that I knew this was all in my head, or that I felt pretty comfortable in being able to kick the shit out of anyone who pissed me off!
I nodded to myself slightly thinking that probably all 3.
I was aware of someone walking with me and staring up at me, I turned to look at them and as I did so a very enthusiastic boy said,
“Hi you must be Mackenzie? Im..”

“Eric,” I finished for him.
He looked a bit surprised but nodded after a split second and continued with his hyper babble about himself, the school and the paper. It was really weird knowing what he was going to say pretty much as he said it. It seemed my psyche had decided to place me at the beginnings of the book.
I wondered if all the same characters would come into play. I also wondered if I could set off some kind of star trek paradox thingy if I said the wrong thing at the wrong time.
With all this running through my head I found my way to the main offices and collected my time table…

Oh my god I was back at school!’


…and was pleased to see that we had gym for our first class. I had what was only just passable as gym clothes, my old torn joggers and a ripped up vintage bob Marley T and my stinky, well loved decrepit runners. I ripped the bottom of my T off and tied it round my head to keep my midlength hair from falling in my eyes and I was ready to go.
I walked out after the rest of the girls and I admit it, my ego had a huge boost. I heard the collective gasp on my entrance. The boys who were already in the gym stopped what they were doing and stared and I knew I was gonna be someone’s wet dream tonight.
I joined the girls, and their reaction was on the most part acidic!! I smiled and took no notice. I was ready to play, I wanted to get out some of my frustration at no knowing what the fuck was going on and I had a split second of pity for these girls who were gonna get it with both barrels.

I really enjoyed the Gym lesson, I worked up a good sweat and was able to vent a bit of anger, something I hadn’t been able to do for quite a while due to my karate being on hiatus. The girl with the bloodied nose was looking at me reproachfully; the rest of the girls now looked mostly worried! The butch female phys Ed teacher asked if I would sign up for some teams and though I didn’t say yes, I didn’t say no either. I went and got showered and changed back into my regular clothes. I looked at my timetable and my next lesson was due to be Biology. I fumbled with the map and tried to see where I was in relation to where I needed to go. A sweet voice asked “Are you ok? You seem a little lost!”
I span around and was met by Angela. I couldn’t stop the huge cheesy grin spread across my face. “Oh Angela, I’m so pleased its you.” I grabbed her and hugged her to me like some long lost teddy. She seemed a little startled and out of breath when I released her but there was a genuine smile on her face.

‘Lost?’

She had no idea! ”I need to get to my Biology class but I don’t have any idea where it is!” I explained.
“It’s ok. I’m off to that class as well, we can walk together.” She said shyly. I liked Angela, she was honest and decent and friendly and seemed like a warm beacon in this icy little sea I was trying to swim through. Just as we got to what looked like our Biology classroom, Eric was waiting outside the door looking around for something. I had a sneaky suspicion that I was the something, but I made a move to squeeze through the door past him and get to the teacher. My move was thwarted by Mike Newton spying me from inside and sprinting deer like to the doorway where I was sandwiched between Eric and Mike and the door. I raised my hands and sucked in my chest and butt trying as much as possible to keep away from the boys lower regions and the semi erect penises that had sprung to life, and pushed through. Once free of the door I straightened and walked to the desk. Mr. Banner took my paperwork and led me to a table. For a second my heart flip-flopped as this was where Bella and Edward should meet, had they not both been off in their own virtual reality somewhere doing what fictitious characters do. I giggled to myself and slipped onto the stool, dumping my bags under the table. I was chuckling as I read the various table graffiti when the person who had been tucking their own bag neatly under the table next to me sat up!

“Oh Shit!” I stated loudly as I turned to face a pair of dark angry eyes.
20 pairs of shocked and amused eyes turned to me!
“I mean, Oh dear, erm …you made me jump… err, Hi!” I swallowed trying to dislodge the huge bowling ball sized lump that was sat just above my larynx encroaching on my ability to speak properly.
Edward didn’t say anything, just looked at me. I stared right back at him, I wasn’t some gauche scared 17 year old, plus I had the added benefit that I was fairly sure that he wasn’t likely to hurt me, despite what his dark look was telling me; Unless of course, my delusionhead had decided to play some cruel twist of fate on me and make Edward into a meatasaurus of Atkins diet proportions!
As we sat staring at each other I took in the vamp gods every feature. WOW Carlisle had been something pretty darn good, but lay me on my back and brand me Edward if he wasn’t the most perfect hunk of manhood I had EVER, set eyes on. He looked like the actor from the film, but he was so so much MORE. The jaw was defined, the neck long and regal, his cheekbones were high and Fuck, his eyes, they were black I mean no kidding totally black. His hair was bronze with lighter and darker tones running through it and had the look of someone who had spent the past month in bed making love.

‘Holy shit what is he doing to me?’


And damn if he didn’t smell like something I wanted to smell for the rest of my life. I was in danger of seriously salivating on the desk and had to stop myself from stripping myself naked and lying back on the table and demanding he took me there and then. It was a good thing that Edward wouldn’t be able to read my thoughts else he would be running for the hills about now! The teacher walked around the room handing out pipettes, which broke my gaze from his, I thanked the teacher briefly and turned back to Edward. He didn’t look as angry just really puzzled.
“I guess I need to thank you.” I said. Once I had managed to learn how to talk and look at him at the same time.

‘Yay for multi tasking!’

He raised a perfect eyebrow in question. “I heard that it was because of you im still here.”
“It’s fine. You don’t need to thank me.” He replied in his musical voice.
“Well you may think I don’t need to thank you but I do, so I shall, so Thank you, for… for what ever it was you did for me.” I nodded happy that I had done the right thing.
“What did you do for me?” I asked not able to hide the genuine interest.
“You don’t remember?” he asked me quietly. I shook my head.
“It was nothing, I just took you to my father at the hospital.” He finished flatly.
“Well thanks.” I felt that there was more than what he was saying but I didn’t press him.
The lesson was pretty interesting and I was switching from looking at Edward to listening to what the teacher was saying. There were a couple of points that he had wrong but they were common mistakes to anyone who didn’t work in the field of haematology. I kept my thoughts to myself but jotted down the correct answer to the problem. As I looked up I noticed that Edward was looking at what I had written. His beautiful eyebrows pulled down over his eyes in a look that I didn’t understand.
If I moved even a fraction closer to him, he would move that fraction away from me. If my head moved closer his would move away, if my hand or leg or body moved, his would mirror mine. I was transfixed on the way his chiseled jaw would flex in effort.
My eyes sparkled at his dark black pools.
He turned away quickly and as expected left just as the bell was about to ring.
“Bye then “I shouted after him and giggled.

‘My delusionhead was fun’

I skipped through the rest of my lessons and went into the cafeteria. I scanned the whole area and saw Angela beckon me over. She was sat with Jessica and Eric and Mike and I knew that I would need to be introduced. So familiar were all these people to me that I was having difficulty in restraining my views of them. Like I had said from the beginning, I said what was on my mind. Even if it were to my detriment.

I grabbed my tray and walked over to Angela and let her introduce me to the others. Jessica had been in my gym class but had been wise enough to stay out of my way. I didn’t like the way she validated herself by pointing out others perceived faults.

“So where are you from?” Mike Newton asked.
I had been prepared for these types of questions and I wanted to be as truthful as I could so that was my plan, where ever I could I would tell the truth.
I explained that I was older than them that I came from England on the outskirts of London and that the school I was attending was more of a university, and I had been lucky enough to be selected for the exchange program. The group surrounding me looked suitable impressed and convinced. I was hoping that I wouldn’t need to run through the story again as I knew that Eric would probably put the details around the whole school by next period. I looked up to the table where I knew Edward and his family should be. Sure enough there they were.

Now I know it kept saying it over and over in the book how beautiful they were and even I got to the point where I was like enough already, we get it they are gorgeous. But. They really and truly were beautiful. Not just in a physical sense, but in the way a piece of music is beautiful, the love of a mother and her child is beautiful, the way an old couple sat on Brighton beach holding hands is oh so beautiful.
They were all these and still more.
“Impressive aren’t they?” Jessica’s nasally voice interrupted my musing.
She went through her intros for the 5 people sat around the table. I looked at them all studying them. I could see Edward talking to them and they all looked up in our direction. Emmett’s big frame was open and friendly even; he had a protective arm around Rosalie’s shoulder. She was stunning, but there was something very sad about her, and even sat there with an outright challenge on her face I felt sorry for her. I smiled and moved my gaze to Jasper. Again the pale skin and the purple rings around the eyes didn’t detract from this warrior’s beauty. I did acknowledge that he seemed to be on constant alert and looked like he needed a good nights sleep. Knowing that this was impossible I moved my gaze onto Alice.
My heart gave a little lurch when I saw Alice; there was something about her that reminded me so strongly of Ruby that my eyes started to well with tears. The loss that I had felt coupled with the total lack of any understanding of what was really happening to me was too much Seeing Alice sat with a protective hand on Jaspers leg so casual but so intimate made my heart wrench. I actually started to feel faint and the panic that I had managed to keep locked up until that point started to bubble to the surface... I stood up and made my excuses quickly and ran for the door.

I managed to get outside and sprawled on the steps of the cafeteria and shoved my head between my knees.
I was taking some deep breaths in through my nose and out through my mouth, and was trying to steady the rapid beating of my heart. A thin sheen of perspiration had broken out on my skin, but it helped being outside.
I stripped off my jacket and tore the jumper over my head.
“Are you ok?” came that beautiful musical voice.
I kept my head down, not wanting to look at Edward in case he made my head spin again.
“I’m fine.” I told him, using his own words to me earlier.
“Well you look like you may need to go see my father again.” He said as he ran a cool hand over my forehead.
I shivered at the contact of his hand to my face, but the coolness was welcome.
“You don’t test a temp on the head, its better on the back of the neck.”
I’d said it before I knew what I was doing, always saying exactly what was on my mind.
“Anyway, I don’t have a temperature, I’m fine.” I kicked myself for feeling so flustered.
I looked up at him and saw the beginnings of a devastating crooked smile.
His eyes wrinkled at the corners as he placed a professional hand down the back of my neck. I lifted my chin, silently daring him .OK he wanted to play did he…..?
I moved my top away from my shoulders allowing him to reach me without difficulty.
As his hand touched my skin it felt like a thousand little electric shocks had been triggered and all of them were heading to my nipples and between my legs.

“Oh Shit!” I gasped out. Edward removed his hand so quickly that I couldn’t have been sure if it had really been there at all.
“Kenze, what are you doing? What are you doing?” I demanded of myself out loud.

I looked up at his dark eyes and I hated what I saw there. He looked confused, and troubled. I could deal with anything apart from the disgust he was showing now.
I got up “Sorry” I muttered my sadness now more than it had been before, and walked to the truck and got in and drove away. I didn’t look back I didn’t want to see Edwards face so disgusted at me.

‘My delusionhead was a sick fucking bastard!’

That was the first night I didn’t dream about Edward Cullen!