Chapter 1

Theres lots of strong language and lemons in my story, please dont read if you are easily offended!I do not own anything, all things Twilight belong to Stephenie Myers

Chapter One.
I’m Obsessed!
Ok I admit it….I’m obsessed, not in your average little girl, pop star obsessed way; but full on stalker capability obsessed- well nearly anyways. It doesn’t matter to me that I am really too old to have these sort of obsessions and really I’m too ‘Normal’ if the truth be known, but it is my passion……….. Hold up, it’s probably not making any sense at all?
Let me start where all good books and movies should always start… At the very beginning…..



‘BUZZ, BUZZ, BUZZ, BUZZ, BUZZ’ what was that god awful sound? I groaned as I flung my hand out to my bedside table feeling for the off button on my alarm. I managed to knock over a half drunk cup of tea, and put my fingers into a squishy half dunked hobnob before eventually finding the sleep button on the devil machine.
I lay in my cozy cocoon for a few more minutes trying to persuade myself that I really didn’t need to get up and go to work today, before the sensible side of my brain got the better of me and literally threw me out of bed and into the shower.
I loved my work I really did, but I had spent most of the darkness hours indulging in my dark secret. I was re reading, for about the 40th time, from start to finish the Twilight Saga*
I was at a point in the book where Bella was still unsure of her heart!! Edward or Jacob? No matter how well I knew the story, it still bugged the shit out of me that Bella was so undecided about whom to be with…o my god, no contest; it was EDWARD of course who wouldn’t choose Edward?
Consequently due to my girly hissy fit and the need to get past that part I had read right through the night until Dawn raised its unwelcome head through my bedroom curtains. I had put my well thumbed copy of the book down and must have fallen asleep immediately.
So when 2 hours later my alarm woke me from my Edward induced revelry I was not best pleased.

Once at work things were ok, I got to see my gal pals Ruby and Summer. They took the piss out of me relentlessly due to my obsession and they thought it was highly amusing to tell my patients that I was secretly in love with a vampire just as I was about to stick them with a large hypodermic needle and withdraw their blood!

During my break I had my head stuck in my book as I chewed on a banana. “Oh Edward” I sighed, and then looked up to see Ruby smiling at me. She was about to say something but I cut her off by looking back to my book and raising my right hand in a ‘stop’ gesture to her. I heard her give a little giggle but that was all.

I so wasn’t girly, I was about as far away from the Bella in my story as anyone could be. Bella in the books was small and petite and brunette and was a quiet unassuming girl, I on the other hand was nearly 6ft blonde haired, and my body was toned to a mix of athletic gal muscle with Xena,s boobs! And though I wasn’t loud mouthed I would always say what was on my mind and I would always stand up for the underdog. My boyfriend was really just a buddy who I happened to have sex with, it suited us both and relieved us of some tension, plus it gave us both someone to take along to those family and couples get togethers that all singletons dreaded. We were happy in our little sex set up.
My escape was to Forks, where I read about the events in the book living them vicariously through Bella, I was Bella and fuck! Lets face it, they didn’t make men like Edward Cullen in reality; so I enjoyed every nuance, look and kiss that Bella and Edward shared, though I have to admit my own full length edit of any physical contact usually came into play on such parts and I could feel between my legs just fizzing at the very idea of a full on open mouthed tongue tied snog with afore mention sexgod vampire Edward.

YES! I know he’s not real, I am aware he is just a character dreamed up by a very talented author. YES! I realized that the Edward on screen was a rather gorgeous actor, who was in all probability nothing like my ideal of Edward. But, I wanted more! I wanted to know more about the places they went I wanted to see what they saw, I wanted to experience it. I wanted to live it!




I had a full night of Twilight reading planned, and I was wearing my fave bunny pj’s and bunny slippers! I had just got to the part of the 4th book when Edward and Bella go on honeymoon on Esmes Island, when Toby turned up. He had been out with Chris and the boys to a footie match and he decided to pop round to see me after the pub. He smiled at me winningly thinking I wouldn’t notice he was pissed and just after a shag!
“Kenze, babe, come here, ive got something for you!!” he said in what I’m sure he thought was a sexy deep seductive voice, but in truth sounded like he had smoked 60 Marlboro a day for the past 30 years and was about to cough up a fur ball, and frankly the rubbing of his cock suggestively with one hand, while he swigged a beer with the other, really didn’t do it for me! I sat beside him on the sofa and he put his arm around me and pulled me towards him, admittedly he had to struggle, he was pissed after all and I was no little lamb, I was 5ft 11 of muscled athlete and it would take more than a Jason Staitham look alike to sway me into relieving him of his stress tonight. After all, my evening was planned with Edward in mind!
I eventually moved towards him a little as he was actually trying to be quite sweet; telling me that I was like the best looking bird he’d ever shagged and how I had raised his kudos since we had been shagging!!
“C’mon Kenze, don’t be a prick tease,” he said all whiney. “Why don’t you take your head out that fucking book and realize you got a real man here instead of a mad freak imagined one?”
He said, whilst stabbing towards his crotch with his hand!

Gee, did I say sweet?

“OK, enough is enough Tobe, you front up here at midnight only in the vain hope of me gratifying your sexual need. I could have had other plans; you should have asked if it was ok to come round at this time, instead of rocking up with your dick hanging out the front of your Levis!”

I explained that I had made plans and that he should at least have asked if I was doing anything else before he assumed that I was ready, willing and able to service his penis every time he got the urge; and let’s face it I would have had a full time job keeping up with that!

Toby looked confused!

CONFUSED?

“I thought that’s what we both wanted?” He said a bit uncertainly.

“We do, I did, YOU do, but……” I stopped mid sentence.
“BUT. Whath?” he asked with the slur in his voice more pronounced than it had been before.
“But, nothing Tobe,” I said finally. “Go home Toby and sober up. I will call you tomorrow.”
I got up and pretty much frog marched him out of my door. He didn’t put up any resistance, he knew better than to resist a 4th Dan in karate!
I kissed him chastely on the lips to soften the rejection and closed the door on him.
I ran back to Edward and Bella as fast as my bunny feet would allow and jumped into my bed and picked up my book which was my doorway to their life, the life that I was more a part of than I was my own.

I lay in my bed looking at the ceiling and holding on to my beloved book and feeling a bit of a bitch for sending Toby away like that, but I couldn’t shake off this feeling, I realized that I wasn’t really living my life, I was only a mere spectator and I knew that I couldn’t keep doing what I was doing. I wasn’t getting any younger I was 26 and I should really have my head sorted by now surely?
I kept hearing my mum’s voice in my head. “Tick tock Mackenzie sweetie, your biological clock is ticking by, you’re not getting any younger and I would like to have a grandchild before im too old to enjoy it!”

‘Charming!’

I made a decision then, time to grow up! I would fulfill my one great burning desire and then I would get on with my life. It all seemed so simple once I decided what I was going to do, I had 4 weeks holiday to use up and well I was going to go to Forks and I was going to experience the air and the places and the people of the place I longed to be more than any other. I was going to go and see all the places I had seen only in my minds eye until that point. I felt sure that a holiday would cure my itchy feet and that once I had been away I would settle down, that I would be able to find myself
I was so excited now that I had made the decision; I went to sleep thinking of all the places I would visit.

It was all so surprisingly easy. Work had been on at me to take my holidays before I lost them and I really thought that I just needed to get away from it all including Toby for a while to evaluate my life and see the wood from the trees as my gran used to say and I would return a new woman.

Ruby and Summer were a little less optimistic than I was at the prospects of me travelling all that way on my own for 4 weeks. I reassured them, “I’ll be fine, it’s not like I haven’t done anything like this before.” My mind skittered back to my New Zealand adventure, that time I had hunted for hobbits and elves!!

OK so there’s a pattern here… I see it, you see it, we all see it, but im a lover of good stories so of course I get involved in the books that I read...lets say no more about it…ok?... OK? Let’s move on shall we?



Ruby still wasn’t convinced and in the next breath she announced that she would use her remaining 2 weeks hols and come with me for the first half of the holiday. I tried to put her off, feeling guilty that she would feel she had to do it for my protection but she admitted to wanting to go to that part of the world, and that I had given her the excuse.
I was secretly relieved! I hadn’t relished all that time on my own in a foreign country, and so far away from home. This way I could do the things I wanted to do on the second part of my hols and on the first part Ruby and I could do all the touristy things together.
Everything seemed to go smoothly from there and the 6 weeks till we left hardly seemed any time at all to wait.
May was probably quite early in the tourist season over there but I didn’t want to have to fight my way around the place, as I was sure that the world and his wife would be visiting due to the growing popularity of the books and the film.
Our little holiday countdown annoyed the shit out of Summer and Toby in particular who had taken the news that I was off on a girls holiday with Ruby a little on the frosty side. When he asked why I hadn’t asked him to go along with me instead, I just said that I hadn’t really thought about asking anyone, I had planned to go on my own and Ruby had asked if she could come with me, plus I knew that he wouldn’t like all the sight seeing and coach trips I was intending to do!
At the words sightseeing and coach trips Toby’s eyes glazed over slightly and I knew he was thinking purple haired senior citizens and train spotters, instead of the beered up, muscle bound Swedish guys all with long flowing blonde hair he had been envisaging moments before!
This seemed to ease his mind, and after that he seemed quite keen on the idea of me going off and leaving him to his own devises for a month.


The night before we flew Toby came over and Ruby and Summer and her boyfriend Chris. We ordered in and had a relaxing meal and got ready for an early start. Ruby was staying over and Toby was staying as well and he was going to flat sit for me. He was under threat of castration if anything happened and I was pleased to see that he wasn’t entirely sure if I was being serious or not!!

We had sex for the last time in 4 weeks, though I was sure that Toby would take that matter into his own hands! But I wasn’t entirely sure that he wouldn’t put it into some one else’s hands. I felt a bit sad at that but I understood, I really was the ideal girlfriend, I could drink as much beer as they did, didn’t ask any questions usually of where/who/when or who with etc and could understand the off side rule better than most blokes!
As soon as Toby had cum he had turned over “thanks love that was great, night” Toby lay there with the used condom hanging limply off of his flaccid dick!
As he turned his back to me, I felt something let go, I knew that that was the last time I would have sex with Toby, I knew it for certain and I was happy about it. I lay staring at my ceiling, and images of Edward came to my mind, his mad bed head hair his gorgeous golden eyes and the angle of his chin, ‘fizz, pop’ went my stomach as the warmth spread out to engulf me, I bet Edward wouldn’t turn over and leave Bella un fulfilled with only his own pleasure in mind. I sighed as I slipped into Edward sleep and as I slept I sighed again as in my dream Edward slipped into me!